Growing up, I thought that the purpose of creating beautiful things was to impress others. I now pursue creative activities just for myself, and this has been a liberating mindshift. I love the process of exploring my feelings and inner world, experimenting with a limitless palette of colour, movement, and sound. I no longer care what the end result looks like, but I am usually pleasantly surprised.
<aside> ✏️ I suggest giving this a try: Sit down with a pen and paper. Take a breath and think about how you are feeling at this exact moment. Let your hands free to channel whatever shapes and textures you are sensing. (Try this with some soothing music!)
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I approached my empty condo as a fun challenge: how might I design my home to induce maximum comfort, happiness, and creativity? I decided that I wanted my home to be a introvert’s retreat and an intimate gathering place for friends (I love hosting). I created many drawings to play around with layouts, furniture, and aesthetics. It took several months, but I am proud to say that I now have a home that matches my unique needs and style - colourful, playful, cozy, multi-functional. A home that I am so glad to come back to every day!
As I develop greater self-love through the practices mentioned above, I’m finding that I care much less about what people think about me, including my physical looks. I’m proud of my very Asian face, I’ve grown out my curls after a decade of straightening, I’m comfortable wearing no make-up in public, and I don’t feel shy about being naked in an onsen. I’m treating my body much better through regular exercise, eating mindfully, and getting plenty of rest and relaxation. Feeling stronger, healthier, and more confident than ever!
I’ve come to better understand and embrace my introversion through learning about MBTI (apparently I’m one of those often misunderstood INFJs), readings like “Quiet” by Susan Cain, and learning from generous mentors. I’ve realized that I connect best with people through one-on-ones and deep conversation, so I’ve stopped forcing myself to go to networking events and large parties. Instead, I enjoy hosting smaller gatherings like artjams and tea chats, where I can help people connect in meaningful ways and share creative experiences. I am also getting better at protecting my much-needed alone time in order to recharge and ground myself.
(to be written)